The Israelites have come back from Babylonian captivity and are attempting to rebuild the wall around the city of Jerusalem. Now, in the middle of the work, they’ve run into a problem that threatens to stop the work and destroy their progress. .

There are three groups in trouble in Jerusalem. There are those with no land, but who need food. There are landowners who have mortgaged their land to buy food in the time of famine. And there are those who have had to borrow money to pay their taxes.

There is a fourth group of Israelites who are loaning them money at interest and requiring their family members as collateral. Because some of the debtors have defaulted, these creditors have taken some of their children as debt-slaves (Nehemiah 5:5). These loan sharks are not enemies from the outside, but their fellow Jews (notice verse 7 - “I rebuked the nobles and rulers, and said to them, ‘Each of you is exacting usury from his brother’” emp. added).

Nehemiah was not a politician who asked, “What is popular?” or a diplomat who asked, “What is safe?”, but a true leader who asked, “What is right?” The way he dealt with the problem is a case study in biblical confrontation. From this passage of God’s Word, we can learn seven keys to biblical confrontation.

When you must confront to correct a wrong, take a note from Nehemiah’s life:

First, manage your anger in the right way.

(5:6 - “And I became very angry when I heard their outcry and these words.”)

In his work, The Nicomachean Ethics, Aristotle said, “Anyone can become angry. That is easy. But to be angry with the right person, to the right degree, at the right time, for the right purpose and in the right way – that is not easy.”

Anger, in itself, is not evil. Jesus became angry. Mark 3:5 records, “And when he had looked around at them with anger, being grieved by the hardness of their hearts…” Jesus was angry, and yet He did not sin (Hebrews 4:15).

Mismanaged anger is sinful. Anger increases our danger for sin. For this reason, Paul, (who knew much of anger prior to his conversion) wrote, “Be angry and do not sin” (Ephesians 4:26).

Anger is a God-given emotion designed to stir us to action in doing good.

Second, get into the right frame of mind.

Nehemiah did not react based on  his emotions alone. He said in 5:7, “After serious thought…” If you look to the literal translation, it would read something like, “My heart reigned as king over me.” It involves mastering your feelings. What Nehemiah is saying is, “I mastered my feelings and discussed the options within myself.”

Third, talk to the right people.

Nehemiah said, “I rebuked the nobles and rulers, and said to them…” (5:7). Our problem is that we would rather talk about people than to people. Often, we would rather destroy a person’s reputation than restore the relationship with them.

Gossip is when we talk to people who are neither part of the problem nor part of the solution.

Let me encourage us to follow the Matthew 18 principle when we need to confront others. Jesus said, “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother” (Matthew 18:15, emp. added).

Notice that first you go alone to your “brother” – not to your friends and not to someone else that you hope will solve the problem.

Note also that you do not go to give him a piece of your mind. (Most of us do not have enough of a mind to give any of it away!) You go to him with one goal – to gain your brother, to restore a broken relationship. If your purpose is simply to get something off your chest, to vent your anger, or to get even – don’t go!

“But if he will not hear,” Jesus said, “take with you one or two more, that by the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established” (Matthew 18:16, emp. added). If your honest effort to restore the relationship and solve the problem fails, find one or two more people to help. A word of caution: Make certain that those who you take with care about the person as well as about you. Make sure they are spiritual people who are looking for biblical reconciliation. Never take with you those who only want to punish the offender. The purpose of this meeting is to be therapeutic, not punitive.

“And if he refuses to hear them, tell it to the church” (Matthew 18:17). When your best efforts to restore a fellow Christian fail, then it becomes necessary to ask for the help of the Church. Again, the purpose of such an action is to encourage the members of the Church to help the offending Christian to correct his error and to be restored.

“But if he refuses even to hear the church, let him be to you like a heathen and a tax collector” (Matthew 18:17). When you have done all that you can to restore the relationship and still the offender refuses, it becomes necessary for the Church to treat the offending brother as though he were not a brother at all. This does not mean that the Christian is now our enemy. The purpose of withdrawal is not to purge church rolls or no longer to feel any concern for him. The purpose is to allow the offender to continue in sin so that he will come to understand its detrimental consequences and return to God and to us. We can never stop loving him or desiring his return to God and to us. Paul said, “But as for you, brethren, do not grow weary in doing good. And if anyone does not obey our word in this epistle, note that person and do not keep company with him, that he may be ashamed. Yet do not count him as an enemy, but admonish him as a brother” (2 Thessalonians 3:13-15). The purpose of withdrawal is not punishment, but rather it is a final effort to restore and save a lost soul. “In the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, when you are gathered together, along with my spirit, with the power of our Lord Jesus Christ, deliver such a one to Satan  for the destruction of the flesh, that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus” (1 Corinthians 5:4-5).

The circle of confrontation should be as wide as the circle of offense. In the case in Jerusalem, this sin was widespread and known publicly. Therefore, it had to be dealt with in a public way. “So I called a great assembly against them…” (Nehemiah 5:7).

Fourth, use the right tone.

Appeal in a reasoning way. Notice that Nehemiah said, “Should you not walk in the fear of our God because of the reproach of the nations, our enemies?” (5:9). In verse ten he said, “Please, let us stop this usury.”

Appeal to your example (and have one). Nehemiah talked about what he and others had done: “According to our ability we have redeemed our Jewish brethren who were sold to the nations. Now indeed, will you even sell your brethren? Or should they be sold to us?” (5:8). In verse 10 he said, “I also, with my brethren and my servants, am lending them money and grain [without interest].” People lose moral authority to effect change if they are not doing right themselves.

Appeal to Their Conscience. He reminds the nobles that those whom they are hurting are a part of their own family. In verse eight he said, “‘…will you even sell your brethren? Or should they be sold to us?’” When they realized the truthfulness of this statement, “then they were silenced and found nothing to say” (emp. added).

Fifth, press the issue to the right point.

Too often, we allow our anger to take our focus away from the real problem. Confrontations begin to escalate when we attack people because of problems, instead of confronting to solve problems. The purpose of confrontation is to solve the real problem - not to win, not to hurt – but to find solutions to the real issue.

In verse seven Nehemiah said, “After serious thought, I rebuked the nobles and rulers.” When he went to the right people about the real issue “then they were silenced and found nothing to say” (5:8).

Sixth, ask them to do the right thing.

Anyone can complain. Anyone can point out the problems. The difference between those who will advance in business and in life and others is that those who advance not only see the problems, but they go to the right people and they offer solutions. Employers do not need more problems. They need solutions.

Ask for a specific commitment. Nehemiah offers a specific solution. “Please, let us stop this usury. Restore… their lands, their vineyards, their olive groves, and their houses…” (5:10-11).

Ask for an immediate commitment. “Restore now to them, even this day, their lands, their vineyards, their olive groves, and their houses” (5:11).

The result? “So they said, ‘We will restore it, and will require nothing from them; we will do as you say’” (5:12).

Seventh, help them stay on the right track.

Nehemiah records, “Then I called the priests and required an oath from them that they would do according to this promise” (5:12). In verse 13, he said, “Then I shook out the fold of my garment and said, ‘So may God shake out each man from his house and from his property who does not perform this promise. Even thus may he be shaken out and emptied!’”

Because he confronted the right way, Nehemiah saw the right results:  “Then the people did according to this promise” (5:13). When we confront in the right way, the right One gets the glory. Notice verse 13 - “And all the assembly said, ‘Amen,’ and praised the Lord.”

God help us to confront according to God’s way!